Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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