i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
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