yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
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