what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
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