I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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