She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Randomize