i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
