I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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