I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Randomize
