i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Randomize
