Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
