Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize
