So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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