What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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