we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
