so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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