I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize