I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize