I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
