People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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