we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize
