I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
