I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
