I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize
