once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
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