Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
