the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
