Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
