just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Randomize