Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
