i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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