Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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