It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
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