ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
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