just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
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