There is no way he is gay with that hair.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
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