I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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