:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
