he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
honey bunches of taint.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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