white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
