quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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