You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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