let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Randomize
