Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
