Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
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