just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
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