Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Randomize
