Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
