I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize