Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
