She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Randomize
