I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
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