I want to make a zoo with you.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
